


Close to me

by Ishxallxgood



Series: Achilles is an Asshole [1]
Category: The Iliad - Homer, The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller
Genre: Achilles is an asshole, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fake/Pretend Relationship, House Parties, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, POV Patroclus, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 22:48:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29233296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ishxallxgood/pseuds/Ishxallxgood
Summary: Prequel toAchilles is an AssholeAchilles wasn't supposed to be at the party. None of this was supposed to happen, but one cannot change what has come to pass.Patroclus convinces Achilles to go to Agamemnon's party. Achilles cannot deny Patroclus anything and goes for his sake. What happens at the party shakes the very foundations of their relationship.This is the story of the one time Achilles was not an asshole
Relationships: Achilles/Patroclus (Song of Achilles), Achilles/Patroclus of Opus (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore)
Series: Achilles is an Asshole [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2146575
Comments: 26
Kudos: 100





	1. So Don't Let me Down

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted a HS Party fic to [Ellie Goulding's 'Close to me'](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=eAaUNJGtbqA&feature=share) and the muse went HAHAHAHA WHAT IF!? and this bullshit happened. I am evidently incapable of not writing angst ❤️

"Pat!"

Patroclus turned to the shrill call of his name and groaned as Deidameia of all people came bounding up to him. "Dei."

"Pat, Pat,  _ please,  _ tell me you're going to Aggy's party Friday."

"I am not going to Agamemnon's party on Friday," he deadpanned, because honestly, he would not be caught dead at Agamemnon's party. Not that he had anything  _ against _ Agamemnon per-say, you know besides the fact that he's constantly trying to hit on Briseis who had made it explicitly clear that she was  _ not _ interested. 

"Oh come on, you  _ have _ to! It's going to be the party of the century!" She whined, looping her arm into his as he continued on his way to English.

"I really don't  _ have to," _ he retorted, "and I don't see why  _ you _ even want me there… or why you're  _ here _ now, you don't even like me."

"Oh come on, Pat," she said, swatting him playfully. "First off, I do so like you, you're very likable, and secondly, we're in the same English class."

"Dei," he said in exasperation, "let's be real here, you really don't actually  _ like _ me, you've barely had one whole conversation with me ever, in the three years I've known you, so like cut the bullshit. Why do you want me to go to this party so bad?"

"Ugh, fine," she whined again, her voice grating. He didn't understand how Achilles could stand her for more than five minutes, then again he knew better than anyone that Achilles really  _ couldn't _ stand her for more than five seconds. "'chilles said he wouldn't go unless you went."

Patroclus barked out a laugh, "you gotta hand it to him," he managed to get out between more laughter, "he really knows how to say no."

"Come on, please, Pat?" She begged, "I'll do anything. I'll be your bitch for a like week… no, a month… the rest of the semester."

"Why?" he asked, laughing even harder, "would I ever want you to  _ be my bitch?" _

"Oh come on, please? I can like do all your homework-"

"No thank you, I'd rather not fail all my classes."

She pouted. "Fine, I'll do all your chores then. I'll come by every day after school and I don't know, clean your house or something."

"Please don't." He said, the laughter dying in his throat. After school time was sacred to him. It was his Achilles time. When they could finally be themselves and not have to hide behind social norms and  _ girlfriends. _

"Please?" She continued to beg, "anything Pat.  _ Anything." _

"If you want to go so bad, just go. You don't need Achilles to go with you."

"But I do, Pat," she whined again, even louder, shriller. He would have to get his ears checked after this conversation. "Everybody is  _ expecting _ me to be there  _ with _ Achilles. You know how those bitches be."

"No, I really don't."

"Oh well, you know,  _ I'm _ the one dating the untouchable  _ god,  _ Achilles-"

"Well aware," he muttered darkly under his breath.

"And like, there are expectations of me. Half of those bitches don't even  _ believe _ that I'm dating him, claiming that I'm just making it up." She's pouting again, but by now they've made it (thankfully) to the classroom and he had an excuse to disentangle her from his body and disappear.

"I'll think about it," he said, more out of pity than anything. 

"Oh my god, really?" She shrieked and he's regretting all his life choices. "You're the best, Pat. I love you. Remember, anything, I'll be your bitch."

He sighed, shaking his head as he found his seat and was finally free of her grating voice.

.

"So Agamemnon's party, Friday," Patroclus said, flopping down on the bed next to Achilles.

"Oh no," Achilles mumbled, rolling onto him. "Et tu, Patroclus? Just stab me in the back and get it over with already."

"I'm just saying," Patroclus said, fingers running through Achilles' hair, "It might be fun."

"It's not going to be fun," Achilles whined, sliding down Patroclus' body until he's nestled in his thighs, "you know what  _ would _ be fun, though?" He asked, eyes shining with mischief as he lifted his head to look Patroclus in the eye, fingers already working open the buckle of his belt.

Patroclus chuckled, shifting to help Achilles help him out of his jeans. "I mean," he gasped as Achilles stroked up the tender expanse of his inner thighs. "Yes,  _ this _ is always fun, but also has nothing to do with Friday night."

"It could," Achilles purred, "if we  _ don't _ go to the party, we could just do this instead. All. Night. Long."

"Oh god," Patroclus moaned, clutching at Achilles' hair as he wrapped his lips around his cock. "You are such a filthy cheater, not fair, can't convince me like this."

Achilles hummed in response, the vibration sending a shock through his system, and it really wasn't  _ fair. _ Not that Achilles ever really played fair, not when it came to getting out of something he really didn't want to do.

"Oh fuck," Patroclus screamed when Achilles did that thing he loves with his tongue, and he's so close to conceding, because yes, he would  _ love _ to do this on Friday night instead. "Just… just… consider it," he panted, "it would make Dei happy."

Achilles popped off his cock and glared at him. "Don't you dare mention that bitch's name again when your cock is in my mouth," he growled, and Patroclus nodded weekly, because yes, he probably should have waited until Achilles was done.

"Sorry, sorry," he apologized, hoping Achilles would choke himself on his cock again, but the mood was already ruined. 

With a huff, Achilles sat up and ran a hand through his hair. "It's so stupid," he said, dropping down against Patroclus again, his eyes slipping closed. "I hate this so much, but mom says it's only until after the Olympics, and then I can do whatever I want, but that's  _ so far _ away. Fucking  _ months, _ Patroclus. I don't know if I can do it. I hate hiding like this so much. Everyone should know how much I love you."

"I mean, to be fair, your mom kind of has a point," Patroclus tried, nuzzling against Achilles hair. "You know how people get. God forbid you're gay. It'll ruin your image, you won't get any sponsors."

"Fuck the sponsors. I don't need the money,  _ mom _ doesn't need the money. I'm there to swim, why the fuck does it matter which way I swing?"

"I know," Patroclus said, wrapping his arms around him, "it's a shitty situation all around, but it's not Dei's fault. You could be a  _ little _ nicer to her. You should have heard her today, she was so excited to be 'dating the untouchable god Achilles.'"

Achilles scoffed. "Don't wanna be nice. She's clingy as fuck, and I can't stand her voice."

"Do it for me?" Patroclus asked, fingers carding through Achilles' hair again, lightly scratching at his scalp and Achilles all but melted.

"Now who's a filthy cheater?" He asked with a jab to Patroclus' ribs. 

"Still you, I didn't ask with my mouth around your cock."

"You still could."

"I still could," Patroclus agreed, flipping them so that Achilles was now on his back. 

He traced his fingers along Achilles' face, across the expanse of his chest and down the flat planes of his stomach. They settled on his hips for a moment, before moving to rip off Achilles' shirt. He followed the trail his fingertips had taken with soft kisses, savoring every inch of Achilles' body. He paused when he reached the top of his jeans again, licking his lips as he took a moment to admire the absolute  _ divine _ vision spread out before him.

"She's right you know," Patroclus said, helping Achilles out of his jeans, pulling his boxers down with them.

"Hn?" Achilles hummed, staring down at him through hooded eyes.

"Dei," Patroclus said, silencing Achilles' grunt of protest with a kiss. "You are most definitely part god."

"Then you should probably get on with your worship."

Patroclus chuckled, and ran his hands over Achilles' body again, relishing the fact that  _ he's  _ actually  _ allowed _ to touch the untouchable Achilles.

.

“You can’t wear that.”

“What do you mean I can’t wear this?” Patroclus asked, turning around to face Achilles proper. He was wearing the jeans  _ Achilles _ had bought him and honestly one of Achilles’ shirts. “Did you want your shirt back?”

“No,” Achilles said, folding his arms across his chest, “keep the shirt, lose the pants.”

“I’m not going pantless, Achilles.”

“Well,  _ obviously,” _ Achilles groaned, flopping down onto the bed. “That would be worse than wearing those jeans. Pick something else.”

“What’s wrong with these jeans?” 

"Everything."

" _ You _ bought them for me."

"Yeah," Achilles said, pushing himself up again to rake his eyes over Patroclus' body. "Because I love the way your ass looks in them. You're not flaunting that ass at a party where I'm not allowed to touch because I'm supposed to be with  _ her." _

"I mean," Patroclus said, half turning so he could check himself out in the mirror, "if it really does make my ass look that good, shouldn't I  _ want  _ to flaunt it?"

"Do you want a massacre on your hands, Patroclus? Because that's what you're gonna get," he said darkly, and Patroclus couldn't believe he had forgotten about Achilles' insanely possessive tendencies. "I swear to god, Patroclus, I will legit murder anyone who dares to covet what's rightfully mine."

"Pretty sure you don't own my ass."

"Pretty sure that's not what you said last night."

"Pretty sure it was your ass that was owned last night."

"Do you want me to murder everyone we know or not?"

"I wanna see you try," Patroclus retorted, taking another look in the mirror. The jeans did actually do a good job at accentuating his ass, and he could see why Achilles would both love and hate them. "Actually no, on second thought, I take that back. I'll change."

"Come here," Achilles said, holding out his arms, and Patroclus went. "Wear the jeans," he murmured softly, wrapping his arms around Patroclus. He held him for a moment, burying his face in the soft center of Patroclus' stomach. "You deserve to be admired. I'll rein in my jealousy for tonight."

"How very gracious of you," Patroclus said with a smile, his fingers finding their way to Achilles' hair. “Do you want me to braid this for you?”

Achilles shook his head. “Nope,” he said, sliding his belt out of the buckle, “I have other plans.”

“Insatiable.”

“Hard not to be when you’re standing here looking like a whole ass meal.”

Patroclus didn’t have the heart to argue, not with the way Achilles was stroking his cock. The jeans were still on, his cock hanging out as Achilles moved to remove his own clothes. “Does this plan involve me fucking you with these jeans on.”

“Maybe.”

Patroclus couldn't argue with the merits of this plan because it was a good plan, even though it most certainly meant that they were going to be late. Then again it's a party. Who cares if they're a little late to a party neither one of them wanted to be at anyway?

Deidameia.


	2. Keep Me in Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party.

"Oh my god, there you are!" Deidameia shrieked as they entered the house. "You guys said eight o'clock the latest, it's nearing nine-thirty! I almost thought you'd never show!"

Achilles groaned and mumbled something under his breath. Patroclus couldn't hear him over the music, but he was pretty sure it was something along the lines of he wished they didn't show. He sighed, gave Achilles' hand a gentle squeeze and guided him closer to where Deidameia was sitting.

"Sorry," Patroclus said when they were close enough for her to hear him without having to scream. "Something came up-" Achilles coughed, nudged him in the ribs with a smirk and a suggestive eyebrow and Patroclus had to hiss at him to behave. 

"Whatever, you're here now," she said waving them off. "C'mon Achilles, let's go dance."

Achilles didn't get a chance to decline before she pulled him out into an empty space in the crowd.

Patroclus could almost  _ feel _ Achilles' sigh of resignation as the music swelled and he started to move. He had to swallow the bitter pill of jealousy as Deidameia pressed her body up against him and his hands reflexively fell to her hips. They moved as one to the beat and try as he might, Patroclus simply couldn't tear his eyes away. They looked  _ good _ together. Like they fit. 

Patroclus knew better than anyone that they  _ didn't _ fit, but even he had to concede that Deidameia had won this round. She got what she wanted. A chance to show off Achilles, to make the world believe that for this moment, he wanted  _ her. _ He didn't though, because Patroclus  _ knew _ what he looked like when he was dancing with someone (him) he  _ actually _ wanted. Achilles couldn't keep his eyes off of him whenever they danced. He couldn't help but duck his head in the crook of his neck and whisper promises for the world against his skin. No, Achilles had his eyes closed now, brows drawn tight and head tilted up, mind far away as his body moved on its own. It was Patroclus' only consolation, that Achilles  _ wasn't _ enjoying himself. 

"Hey, Pat."

Patroclus startled, pulling his eyes away to focus on the voice calling him. "Brisies!" He exclaimed in surprise, "what are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same," she said, flashing him a smile as she took a drink from the cup she was holding. "Thought you wanted nothing to do with Agamemnon outside of the field."

He shrugged. She was right. "Dei asked me to come because 'chilles said he wouldn't show unless I did."

"Wow, what an asshole."

Patroclus laughed. "I mean, to be fair, she did say she'd do anything for me if I came, and I figured what better way to get her to leave me alone and never talk to me again."

"Fair point," she said, eyes drifting over to them. "They're cute."

Patroclus made a non-committal noise. 

"You know," she said, taking another careful sip from her cup, "imagine my shock when  _ the Achilles Pelides _ asked me to homecoming. Me, the nobody new girl, and like a fool I said yes. What a joke."

Patroclus felt a little guilty about that. It was at his insistence that Achilles had asked her, and then promptly forgot about it and went with him instead. In fact, he really should stop using his power over Achilles to get him to do stupid shit like go out with random girls (even though in this particular case was more in deference to Achilles' mom than anything else).

"I'm sure he just forgot or something, you know how he is."

Brisies scoffed. "Right. An absolute asshole."

Patroclus shrugged. He deigned to acknowledge that comment with a response, because yes, things that Achilles did  _ could _ be misconstrued as assholeish, but this was Achilles.  _ His _ Achilles, and his Achilles was anything but an asshole. He was loving and kind, and always did anything in his power to make Patroclus happy, even dance with Deidameia at some lame ass party.

"Just cause he's pretty he thinks he can get away with treating people like shit."

Patroclus wanted to say something. To defend Achilles' honor, but what was there to say? That Achilles didn't  _ mean _ to treat people like shit, it's just that he didn't generally care enough about people to bother, because they were  _ beneath _ him (and honestly, he'd have to agree, most people were). It probably wouldn't sit right with someone like Brisies who was kind to  _ everyone _ and tried to believe the very best in them. Achilles was just  _ above _ most people, and it wasn't  _ his _ fault he had to look down on them. Nope, that definitely wouldn't help his case so Patroclus just shrugged again. "He doesn't treat me like shit."

"Yeah, well you're conjoined, you don't count."

"I should count for  _ something," _ he argued and it gave her a slight pause. 

"Oh you count for everything, Pat," she said with a sad smile. "You're the very best of men, and if he treated you like shit too then he'd have no soul."

_ He's the other half of my soul, _ was what Patroclus  _ wanted  _ to say but he couldn't. Not when Achilles was supposed to be dating Deidameia and they were fitting so nicely together on the dance floor. 

"Dance with me," Brisies said, putting down her cup to take his hand. 

He didn't have it in his heart to say no to her. Not to the girl who he knew wanted to be here just about as much as he did. Not to his best friend outside of Achilles. Not to the girl he'd actually consider dating if not for the fact that his heart, his very soul belonged to Achilles. 

"Yeah sure," he said, slipping out onto the dance floor, which was really just the main sitting room with the couches pushed back. He didn't miss the way Achilles cracked an eye as they passed him by, nor the way his eyes narrowed when Brisies slotted her body up against his. It was going to be a long night. 

He was not surprised when after maybe a song and a half Achilles found him and pulled him away. Declaring that he had had enough of dancing and needed a drink. Patroclus gave Brisies an apologetic smile as he allowed Achilles to drag him off. He didn't miss the glare she shot him, nor the way she mouthed 'asshole' while pointing at Achilles. 

It didn't take them long to locate the kitchen and the plethora of alcohol littered about it. Achilles wasted no time downing three shots and grabbing a beer. It was a dangerous line letting Achilles get wasted, but Patroclus chose not to say anything because he knew that Achilles needed all the alcohol in the world to get through the night (especially when Deidameia came bounding up to them again, Brisies in tow). 

"Come on," Deidameia whined, pulling at Achilles' arm, "they're playing beer pong downstairs, you should go show them how it's done."

Achilles nodded, downing the beer in his hand and pulling his arm out of Deidameia's grasp to place onto Patroclus' shoulder. "Let's go, Patroclus is on my team."

He could practically  _ feel _ Deidameia's pout as Achilles led him out of the room, but there was nothing he could do about that now. She had been the one to suggest beer pong, as if Achilles would have chosen anyone other than him to partner with. 

They were greeted with a cheer as they entered the basement game room. The whole team was there, crowded around a table where Agamemnon and Menelaus were being decimated by Hector and Paris. In fact, a majority of the Trojan team was there too, and Patroclus was honestly glad for it. Not that he didn't like his  _ own _ teammates, but Hector was far better company than Agamemnon (although he couldn't say the same about Paris).

“Achilles! Patroclus!” Odysseus called from across the room, “it’s about damn time! The Trojans are slaughtering us.”

“That’s because Agafucknon is playing for you!” Achilles yelled back, laughing when Agamemnon threw up the finger.

“Oh they were slaughtering us before those two started,” Odysseus said, crossing the room to drape his arms around the both of them. “Ain’t nobody can match your aim,  _ aristos achaion.” _

Patroclus rolled his eyes as Achilles practically preened at the nickname. "I wouldn't be much without Patroclus," he said in response, ducking out from under Odysseus' arm to plaster himself against Patroclus.

Oh fuck. Patroclus could feel the hard lines of Achilles' body pressed against him, the alcohol induced heat radiating off of him, and it quickly dawned upon him how  _ bad _ of an idea this was. They've been here for less than half an hour and Achilles was already three shots and a beer in. The prospect of however many rounds of beer pong (all of which Achilles would have to drink  _ everything _ because Patroclus was driving) would lead to a  _ very  _ drunk Achilles. Which all on all wouldn't have been an issue if there were alone (or you know  _ not _ trying to pretend Achilles was dating Deidameia), because a drunk Achilles meant an affectionate Achilles, and an affectionate Achilles meant that he wouldn't be able to keep his hands off Patroclus. Patroclus was sorely regretting his decision of  _ not _ changing out of those jeans.

Everything happened faster than Patroclus had anticipated. One second Agamemnon and Menelaus were getting their asses handed to them by Hector and Paris, and the next Achilles and him were on their fourth round of beer pong, bringing glory to the Mustangs.

Odysseus hadn't been blowing smoke when he had said that nobody could match Achilles' aim, because even drunk,  _ nobody _ could match Achilles' aim. And honestly, Achilles wasn't kidding either when he had claimed it was all because of Patroclus, because every shot he took was grounded by his arm around Patroclus' shoulder and Patroclus' arm around his waist. It would have been fine if Achilles didn't take every chance he had to press even closer, practically grinding his growing erection against Patroclus' leg.

"Fuck, I gotta pee," Achilles whined, tossing the empty cup behind his shoulder. Deidameia's indignant squeak reminded Patroclus that one, she was still there, and two, Achilles probably intentionally hit her with the cup (because things  _ always _ landed where he intended for them to). "Come with me, Patroclus," he said, drawing out his name. 

Patroclus fought the blush rising to his cheeks and the blood rushing to his groin, but he had very little control over the way his body reacted when Achilles said his name  _ like that. _ The most he could do was untangle Achilles from his side and attempt to guide him towards the stairs. "You're on your own for that one, buddy. Not gonna hold your dick for you." He regretted that last line almost immediately when Achilles turned towards him with a sky grin, but he managed to shove him up the stairs before he could say anything compromising.

Patroclus dropped down onto the couch the moment Achilles made it up the stairs. They would have to leave soon. He wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to keep Achilles from climbing onto his lap. 

"Patroclus."

"Hector."

"Nice to see Achilles can manage to pee without you holding his dick," Hector said, dropping down next to him. 

Patroclus snorted. "That is yet to be seen."

"Touche," Hector said with a tip of his beer. "No drink?"

"Naw, I'm driving."

"Good man!" Hector said, downing his beer and slapping Patroclus on the back. "Wish we had that kinda foresight. Paris is as lit as I am, might have to crash here tonight."

"Why are you even here?" Patroclus asked with a laugh. "You literally hate Agamemnon."

"So do you."

"Fair, but a pretty girl begged me to come, and I don't see Mache here."

"Oh shit," Hector said, sitting up to look Patroclus in the eye, "Bris finally grew the balls to ask you out?"

Patroclus laughed again. "No, not Bri. Dei."

"No shit. She trying to tag team the dynamic duo?"

"No, nothing like that. Pretty sure she's just in it for Achilles."

"I don't know man, between you and me, you're the better catch. Sure Achilles is pretty, but he's like pretty boy pretty, and pretty much a dick. You, you're the whole package."

"Why, Hector, I'm flattered. If I didn't know better I'd think you were flirting with me."

Hector barked out a laugh, clapping him on the back. "If only I swung that way, Pat. If only I swung that way. You'd be on the top of my list."

Patroclus laughed too. "Well I'm honored, Hector, truly. Unfortunately if I swung that way, well, I'd be all over Achilles."

"Ha, I'm not surprised," Hector said, his smile wavering. "You and everyone else. One would think he shits gold or something."

"No, I can pretty much assure you he doesn't."

"But seriously," Hector said straightening up (and if Patroclus had not been mistaken) with a pout, "you'd seriously pick that asshole over me if you had the choice?"

_ A thousand times yes. _ "I mean…" Patroclus faltered. "You're a great guy, no, seriously, you are, but Achilles…" Patroclus sighed. He closed his eyes and leaned back into the couch. "You know, he's really not the asshole everyone seems to think he is. Sure, he has his moments, but don't we all? I don't know, he's been my best friend since I was nine, so I might be a little biased."

"Perhaps a little," Hector agreed, but didn't press, which Patroclus was thankful for. If he had pressed, Patroclus wasn't sure if he'd truly be able to hide how deep his love for Achilles actually ran. "So, Deidameia, eh? They serious?"

"I guess," Patroclus said with a shrug, not bothering to open his eyes. "It's still relatively new, so we'll see where that goes."

"Does it bother you?"

"Does what bother me?"

"That they're dating?"

Patroclus cracked an eye to look at Hector. "No? Why would it bother me?"

"Hn, no reason," Hector said, waving him off. They're quiet for a moment, watching the room. Paris was getting into it with Menelaus, probably over Helen. Agamemnon was trying to look intimidating looming over Menelaus' shoulder, but he just looked like an ass. Brisies was talking to Automedon and a couple of Trojans whom Patroclus recognized but didn't know the names of. Hector followed his gaze and smiled. "So Brisies-"

"Just a friend," he said almost too quickly, but then Brisies looked up and caught his eye. She flashed him a smile and he automatically raised his hand in greeting.

"Oh?"

"Yeah," he said, as Brisies excused herself from the group and started making her way over. "I mean she's great, and pretty, and pretty much amazing-"

"Hey guys," she said, dropping down on the arm of the couch next to him and throwing an arm around his shoulders. Patroclus' mouth snapped shut and Hector raised an eyebrow at him, but he chose to ignore it. Brisies was just a friend. "Did you know Automedon's family owns a ranch? With  _ horses.  _ I  _ love _ horses."

"Oh yeah," Patroclus said, turning to look up at her. "Achilles boards his horses there."

"Achilles has horses," she said, not hiding her disdain. "Of course he does."

"I mean, they're his family's horses, although Pedasos is his, but between us, they all like me more."

Brisies laughed and ruffled his hair. "Of course they do, everyone likes you more because-"

"Yes, yes, Achilles is an asshole," he finished for her. "Okay but like, did you know Achilles owns  _ chariots _ too? I mean okay, one of them is mine because his dad thought it'd be hilarious to get us chariots. His mom got so mad."

Hector raised an eyebrow at that and looked like he wanted to comment, but what was there to say? They had fucking chariots, which honestly they hadn't raced in far too long. He should do something about that. 

*You guys are so weird," Brisies said, slumping down against him. "Why ride a chariot when you can just ride the horse."

"I mean, I like both. There's a certain thrill to being pulled around on a chariot, although there's certainly more control when just riding the horses. Balius and Xanthus do amazing with the chariots though. You should see them, it's as if they were made of the winds themselves."

"Oh that would be lovely. I'm sure they're amazing horses, well all horses are amazing." Brisies beamed at him, launching into an excitable discussion on the merits of horse, most of which Patroclus wholeheartedly agreed with. Horses were amazing.

"Hey, maybe we can go for a ride sometime. I'm sure I can convince Balius to let you ride him, of the three he's the one you'd want to ride. Xanthus has a mind of his own and will probably buck you off, and Pedasos, well knowing him he won't let you anywhere near him. If you think Achilles is stubborn, you've never met his equine counterpart." 

"Really?" Brisies asked, barely able to contain her excitement. "Pat, that would be amazing! When would you be free?"

"I mean I'm usually down there Sunday mornings when Achilles has his brunch dates with his mom, so if you're free around nine-ish on Sunday we could probably take Balius and Xanthus out."

"Oh my god, really, Pat?" She squealed, tackling him to the couch. "That would be amazing! I can't wait to ride Balius! It's been forever since I've gone riding."

"Fuck you, you're not riding Balius, he's not for peasants."

"Achilles!" Patroclus yelped, disentangling himself from Brisies to push himself up. "Don't be an ass."

"Okay fine, whatever," Achilles said, waving them off with a flick of his wrist (which Patroclus knew meant he didn't actually give a shit if Brisies rode his horse or not), before grabbing Patroclus by the arm. "C'mon, we're leaving. I'm over this place."

"Oh, okay," Patroclus said as Achilles practically dragged him towards the stairs. "I'll see you Sunday, Bri. Nice seeing you, Hector."

Brisies scowled at him but nodded while Hector gave him a two finger salute. He scrambled to follow after Achilles who still had a death grip on his wrist and was steadily making his way across the room.


	3. Born To Be Wild

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The after party

Achilles was on him the moment they stepped into his room. He kissed him with a fervor that Patroclus had never known (not that Achilles didn't always kiss him with fervor, because he did, but there was something different about this, something almost  _ desperate). _ Only Patroclus had to stop him, because he tasted of alcohol and bile, and although he would always _love_ kissing Achilles, he did have a line and this was probably it. 

"Achilles, baby," Patroclus said, pulling away and holding Achilles at arm's length. "I love you, I do, but you taste like something crawled into your mouth to die."

Achilles scowled. His brows knitted together, eyes narrowing and then he shoved Patroclus' hands off his shoulders and ripped off his shirt. "Fine," he said in a voice Patroclus barely recognized, fingers already moving to work open his jeans. "Don't kiss me, just fuck me then."

"No" The word escaped him before he had a chance to stop himself, but something was  _ wrong. _ "You're drunk." This wasn't Achilles. Or rather this was Achilles, but this wasn't  _ his _ Achilles. This was the other Achilles, the Achilles everyone else got. The Achilles who was devoid of light and warmth and was quite frankly an asshole.

Achilles froze. His head whipped around and he stared at Patroclus, expression unreadable, and then something dark crossed over his eyes. "Whatever," he growled, breaking the eye contact and kicking off his jeans. He shoved past Patroclus and slammed the bathroom door, leaving Patroclus to stare absently at the space he had once occupied.

The sound of the shower kicking on broke him from his stupor and he moved to undress himself.  _ It's fine, _ he told himself as he crawled into bed, because it  _ had  _ to be fine. Achilles was probably just drunk. He didn't take rejection well on a good day, and right now, he clearly wasn't having a good day.

He was on the cusp of sleep when Achilles slid in behind him, arms coming around to pull him flush to his chest as he buried his face into the crook of Patroclus' neck. "I'm sorry," he murmured against Patroclus' skin, arms tightening as he shuddered. 

Patroclus wanted to move. To turn around and wrap Achilles up in his love. To fuck him like he had asked and love on him the way he clearly needed right now, but his body refused to move. It was stuck in that stage of pre-sleep where everything just felt heavy and all he could do was groan slightly in response.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," Achilles continued to murmur, punctuating each  _ "I love you" _ with a kiss. There was a wetness left on his skin, whether it was from the kisses or the residual dampness from his shower, or something else entirely, Patroclus didn't know. But what he did know was that he returned the sentiment tenfold. 

"Love you too," he managed to croak out, willing his hand to move to twine his fingers together with Achilles' before sleep overtook him.

.

"You're really okay with me taking Bri out with the horses right?"

Achilles looked up from the guitar he was idly fiddling with to stare blankly at Patroclus. "Huh?"

"Tomorrow, when you're out with your mom, you're cool with me letting Bri ride Balius right?"

"Oh that," he said, tossing the guitar aside to pull Patroclus into his arms. "Yeah whatever, the horses like you more anyway."

Patroclus frowned. Something was still  _ off _ about the way Achilles was acting. He had been unusually quiet all day, and had refused to meet Patroclus' eyes at all. He was still as tactile as ever, but more often than not spent the majority of the time burying his face in Patroclus' shoulder. "Are you okay, 'chilles?"

"'M fine," Achilles mumbled into his shoulder. 

"If you say so," Patroclus said, lifting his hand to stroke through Achilles' hair. "Want me to braid this?"

Achilles nodded, releasing Patroclus so they could switch places. It was cathartic, carding his fingers through Achilles' hair until it was perfectly smooth, and then gathering the strands up into a braid which would run along the left side of his head. Then again, Patroclus' fingers in his hair was probably one of Achilles' favorite things. It was probably why he kept it long, despite how impractical it was for swimming. 

"Your mom's not going to cut this for the Olympics, right?" Patroclus asked, suddenly overwhelmed by the thought that Thetis might actually do it, because it  _ was _ impractical.

"She won't. My speed is in my hair, like Samson."

Patroclus laughed at the absurdity of that statement. Everyone knew that Achilles' speed had nothing to do with his hair. He was practically born in the water, as if he was the child of a sea goddess or something. "I'm not sure you mom buys that."

"Honestly, I don't think she cares, as long as I keep breaking records."

"Mmm, that's good," Patroclus hummed, tying off the braid to run his fingers through Achilles' hair again. "I love your hair. It'd be a shame if you had to cut it, especially since then I wouldn't be able to do this," he said, grabbing a fist full of hair and tugging. 

Achilles groaned as his head snapped back and Patroclus was able to press a kiss against his lips. "Yes, it would be a damn shame," he said, stealing another kiss. "Do it again."

.

Patroclus fell face first onto his bed, burying his face into Achilles' preferred pillow. It had been a helluva week. The absolute worst actually. The only good thing about it was Sunday when he had gone out riding with Brisies. Balius had taken to her as amicably as he did anyone else, which was honestly with an air of indifference, but he did let her ride him and didn't buck her off. Small victories. 

The rest of the week though, was absolute shit. Honestly, it started Monday when he got to school to see Deidameia hanging off Achilles' arm, and Achilles absolutely refusing to make eye contact with him. He had basically ignored him the whole day, refusing to even sit with them at lunch and instead opted to stay by Deidameia's side. It wouldn't have stung as bad if things had gone back to normal once they got home, but it didn't. Achilles was quiet and quite honestly, standoffish when he came over. Sure they still hung out, they still talked cradled in each other's arms, but everything felt forced. Like he had to fight for every word, every touch, every kiss.

And so the week went. Every day had been the same. Ignored at school and barely present at home. In fact, it had gotten so bad that at one point Odysseus had asked him if they were fighting, but every time he asked Achilles if something was wrong, all he got was a "no" and a kiss to distract him. 

And now this.

It wasn't as if he didn't  _ know _ Achilles had that dinner thing tonight, because he knew. They had talked about it before, and honestly, Achilles was allowed to have a life outside of him. Patroclus didn't care about the dinner. He didn't care that he was explicitly  _ not  _ invited by Thetis, because he understood. This was important. This was about the Olympics and press and his  _ future. _ The only thing was, he wasn't aware that  _ Deidameia _ had been invited.

Honestly, it wouldn't even have been a big deal if it weren't for the shit week he's had. Achilles hated Deidameia, that much he knew. Regardless of the front he had been putting up at school, Patroclus  _ knew _ Achilles, and he knew when Achilles wasn't happy. And Achilles wasn't happy. And there was absolutely  _ nothing _ he could do about it (and not for lack of trying). 

.

Patroclus awoke to the weight of Achilles spread across his lap and their noses touching. "Hrm," he mumbled, hands moving on their own accord to brush the hair from Achilles face before it fell upon his.

He froze. Eyes snapping open and suddenly _ awake _ when his hands brushed through air. Achilles straightened up, pulling away slightly as he sat back on his haunches, trapping Patroclus underneath him.

Patroclus stared- his early morning brain refusing to accept what it was he was seeing. It was Achilles. It was definitely Achilles, but his hair was gone. Well not completely gone, but there was next to nothing left. 

"What," he muttered, fingers trailing along the fuzz left at the base of his neck, working their way up to run through a mere inch or two of hair that was left, and heavily styled. "What happened?"

"You hate it." Achilles was refusing to look at him again, eyes cast down at the center of Patroclus' chest. No, he didn't hate it. It looked good on him, but he had an inkling that any hairstyle would look good on him. He just couldn't braid it anymore. Or pull it. He definitely couldn't pull it anymore.

"I don't hate it," he said, pulling Achilles down against him so he could tuck his nose into the crook of his neck and breath him in. He smelled of hair product and soap, but also  _ Achilles, _ and it settled him for a moment. "I just thought you weren't going to cut it."

Achilles shrugged, burrowing closer with a content sigh. "It might have been impulsive, but what's done is done. It's just hair."

"Yeah," Patroclus breathed out, heart clenching in his chest and settling heavy in his stomach. "It's just hair." 

And it was  _ just _ hair. He knew it was just hair. Hair grew back. Hair didn't define a person. It shouldn't matter that Achilles cut his hair. It  _ shouldn't _ bother him, but it did. It cut him deep- a straight line right through the heart. It felt like a personal slight (even though he  _ knew _ it wasn't), because they had  _ just _ talked about it. Because Patroclus  _ loved _ his hair, and he had said as much, and Achilles had assured him he wouldn't cut it, and now it's just gone.

"Hey," Achilles' voice dragged him out of his own head. Brought him back to the weight of Achilles on top of him and the feel of his hands against his face. Patroclus hadn't noticed he was crying until Achilles was gently wiping away his tears. "It's just hair, just until the summer, then I'll let it grow back."

Patroclus nodded. Swallowed down the sob wanting to claw its way out and squeezed his eyes shut. He was being ridiculous. Gods it was just hair. "I'm sorry," he choked out, "I know, I know, it's just hair. Fuck, I don't even know why I'm so upset."

"You're allowed to be upset," Achilles said, and his voice sounded so small. So broken. "You loved my hair."

"I love  _ you _ more."

"I know," Achilles whispered against his skin, kissing away his tears. "I know. And I love you too. Please know that Patroclus. I love you so much it  _ burns. _ Please, please,  _ please, _ don't ever doubt that. No matter what."


	4. Out in the Jungle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Achilles loved him_

_ Achilles loved him. _ Was what he told himself when he passed him in the hallway, Deidameia hanging off his arm and Achilles pointedly ignoring him.

_ Achilles loved him. _ Was what he told himself when Achilles refused to even look at him for hours on end while they sat in his room.

_ Achilles loved him.  _ Was what he told himself when once again Achilles allowed himself to be dragged away by Deidameia at lunch without so much as a backwards glance. 

_ Achilles loved him. _ Was what he told himself when Achilles refused to look at him when they fucked, choosing instead to bury his face in the pillow, refusing to let Patroclus turn him around.

_ Achilles loved him. _ Was what he told himself when it's been three weeks since he can last remember  _ laughing _ with Achilles, or even smiling. Since he felt like a whole person, and didn't fall asleep every night with tears in his eyes.

_ Achilles loved him.  _ Was what he told himself when his dad explicitly forbade him from missing school to go to Achilles' swim meet four hours away. It wasn't as if either of them had expected him to have been able to go, his dad  _ never _ let him go to the out of town meets because  _ "it's not like you're on the team, boy. You are not sacrificing _ **_your_ ** _ education to follow him around like a bitch in heat."  _ But he had to remind himself that Achilles loved  _ him,  _ because he said so. Because he told him to never doubt that. Because  _ she _ was going, and Thetis had been more than happy to bring  _ her _ along. 

_ Achilles loved him.  _ Was what he told himself as the tears spilled from his eyes because Achilles did not refute her statement that she was  _ pregnant _ with  _ his child. _

_ Achilles loved him. Achilles loved him. Achilles loved him. _

His phone was shattered. There was nothing he could do about that. He probably shouldn't have thrown it across the room. He probably should have gotten a better case for it, maybe actually have bothered to replace the screen protector after the last one shattered, but then again it wasn't like he had  _ planned _ to throw his phone across the room. He also didn't exactly  _ plan _ to smash Achilles' guitar against the wall either. Yet here he was, with both a destroyed phone and a destroyed guitar and a hollowness in his chest.

A righteous anger burned within him. Deidameia was  _ pregnant. _ As far as he knew, there was really only  _ one _ way to get pregnant (well two if you include in vitro fertilization, but he's pretty sure she didn't somehow  _ find  _ his sperm and then find a doctor who'd be willing help a minor impregnate herself even if she had the money to pay for it) and Patroclus felt sick thinking about it. Achilles had ignored him for the better part of a month for  _ her.  _

But  _ Achilles loved him. _

He wanted to believe it. He really,  _ reall _ y wanted to believe it. Gods he wanted to believe it, but then when Achilles slammed into the room, something inside of him snapped. Patroclus took one look at him and did the only thing he could think to do.

He left. 

Achilles had shouted his name. Reached for him, but he pushed past him and kept walking. He moved without thinking, descending the stairs and exiting through the front. He didn't think about  _ where _ he was going, he just went.

He was halfway down the pier before Achilles finally caught up with him. It had honestly taken him longer than it should have to catch up with him, Achilles  _ was _ the fastest (well second fastest, no one was faster than Hermes) person he knew both in and out of the water. 

"Patroclus, wait," he said, grabbing his wrist.

"Let go," he said, trying to pull his arm free, but Achilles just tightened his hold.

"Please wait," Achilles pleaded, clawing at his arm, begging Patroclus to look at him, and for the first time in almost a month, he met his eyes. "Please let me explain."

Patroclus froze when he saw the panicked desperation there. He didn't know what to say, what to do. Dueling emotions warred within him, anger and devastation, sympathy and pain.

"She fucked me." Patroclus' heart stopped. His brain screeched to a halt as he attempted to parse out those words through a veil of tears.

"What?" Was all his rebooting brain could manage to say and Achilles cupped his cheek with his hand, wiping at the tears that wouldn't stop falling. 

"I… I'm sorry, Patroclus," he said, voice breaking. And Patroclus could hear it again. The way Achilles had said he loved him. That desperation in his voice as he begged him to never doubt it. And he didn't. He didn't, but Deidameia was pregnant. "Patroclus  _ please.  _ I'm so sorry. Please, I didn't want to… I just woke up and she was… she was just… and I…"

The pieces suddenly fell together. Like a teacup gathering itself back together, and a new anger flared up inside of him. Deidameia had  _ raped _ Achilles. Gods, Deidameia had  _ raped _ Achilles at Agamenmon's party. Deidameia had  _ raped _ Achilles at Agamenmon's party, which  _ he _ had begged him to go to.

"Oh no," he said, pulling Achilles into his arms. "No, no, no, you don't have to be sorry, baby. There is nothing to forgive. You, you didn't do anything wrong."

"I-" he got cut off by a sob, and it was the first time in his life he had  _ ever _ heard Achilles  _ sob, _ and he decided right there and then that he never wanted to hear that sound again. He never wanted to hear Achilles sound so hollow and broken. No, Achilles was made for laughter and life. Achilles was the sun, the light of his world. The very essence of everything good and pure in his life.

_ "I'm  _ sorry," he said, hands moving to run through hair that wasn't there anymore.  _ Fuck. _ That was probably because of her too. If he could, he'd hunt her down. He'd hunt her down and tear her hair out from her scalp. He'd cut her open while she was still screaming and rip her lungs from her chest. He'd drag her desecrated body through the town by the back of his car until everyone knew what a vile bitch she was, but he couldn't. Because that would be wrong. And he wasn't a murderer. And he didn't actually want to rot in prison for the rest of his life. "Fuck, Achilles, I'm so sorry."

"Patroclus," Achilles sobbed, clinging desperately to him. "Please don't hate me, I'm sorry. Don't leave. I can't do this without you. I can't. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Hey, Achilles, no," he said, pulling Achilles down with him as he settled down against the railing. "Listen to me, Achilles, I don't hate you. I'm not leaving you, this was  _ not _ your fault."

"I  _ betrayed  _ you _ , _ Patroclus," he said between gasps for air. "I… I didn't  _ stop _ her. I should have stopped her. Fuck, Pat, I'm  _ so sorry." _

Patroclus wanted to scream. He wanted to scream and hit something. Break something. Gods he wanted to break Deidameia's face, but he couldn't. He wouldn't. All he could do was hold Achilles. Hold Achilles while he sobbed in his arms. Hold Achilles and pray that he could piece him back together again. 

They would get through this. They would. He would ensure that they did.

"There's nothing to apologize for, baby. Nothing at all." He wiped at the tears streaming down Achilles face. Pressed kisses against his swollen eyes. Ran his fingers through still too short hair (even though it was growing out again- it'll never be the almost three feet it was, at least not for a while, but it was almost long enough to pull again). "Listen to me Achilles," he said, cupping Achilles face in his hands, "you didn't do anything wrong."

"You didn't," he insisted when Achilles shook his head. 

"I…" Achilles choked on another sob, shaking Patroclus' hands free to bury his face in his shoulder. "I  _ finished,  _ Pat… I actually came… inside of her… fuck, Patroclus… I  _ knew  _ it wasn't you… I  _ knew  _ it was all wrong, too wet, too soft… but I couldn't  _ do _ anything about it. She was just there, on top of me, with my dick inside her and it just  _ happened." _

"You were violated," Patroclus seethed through gritted teeth, arms tightening around Achilles as he smoothed a hand through his hair. 

Achilles shook in his arms, and he held him close again. He tried to shield him from the world, from everything that wasn't  _ them.  _ Achilles didn't deserve this. Achilles deserved to be loved, wanted, cherished, so Patroclus held him and whispered sweet nothings against his ear because Achilles  _ needed _ to know.  _ "I love you." _

"You're not angry?" Achilles asked, when the sobs subsided and he could almost breathe normally again. "I fucked up, Pat… I let her  _ touch  _ me. I…" his breath hitched again, tears welling up in his eyes and Patroclus pulled him in closer.

"Fuck," he breathed out under his breath, smoothing his hands down Achilles arms. He seriously needed to punch something, but Achilles needed him more right now. He could deal with the pent up aggression later. He can tape Deidameia's face to the bag when they're done and then beat that into oblivion. "Achilles," he said, lifting his chin gently so he could kiss away the tears, look him in the eye. "I am not angry, not with you. Baby, you didn't do anything wrong. You were drunk and I was wearing those jeans, and she took advantage of you. That bitch violated you and was riding your dick, of course you finished. It doesn't  _ mean _ anything, except that you're a healthy male who responded appropriately to stimulation. I would  _ never _ hold that against you, baby.  _ Never." _

"I'm-"

"Shhh," Patroclus hushed him, letting Achilles' head drop back down onto his shoulder. He ran his hand through his hair again, teasing at the short ends by the nape of his neck. "It's okay, baby, it's okay."

Patroclus held him as the night washed over them. Achilles was still trembling and tense in his arms, so he closed his eyes and sang. 

_ "I was searching, you were on a mission," _ Achilles' breath hitched, hands coming around to clutch at him.  _ "Then our hearts combined like a neutron star collision. I have nothing left to lose, you took your time to choose, then we told each other with no trace of fear that-" _

_ "Our love would be forever."  _ Achilles' voice was shaking, but Patroclus could feel the beginnings of a smile pressed against his skin. 

_ "And if we die, we die together." _

Achilles sat up a little straighter, his voice getting a little stronger as he joined in. By the time they finished the song, Achilles had calmed down significantly. Patroclus held him, staring off into the distance, taking in the twinkling lights of the city across the bay. "I think you should tell your mother."

"Hn?" Achilles hummed, half asleep against him. 

"What happened with Dei, I think you should tell your mother," he repeated. There was a nod, and then Achilles' head dropped back down heavy against him. He was already asleep. Patroclus sighed and ran his fingers through Achilles' hair again, scratching at his scalp the way he liked it. 

_ Achilles loved him. _

He never should have doubted that. Never. The rage simmered within him and he pulled Achilles properly onto his lap, burying his face against too short hair which tickled his nose. "I'm sorry," he whispered, "we never should have been there, this never should have happened." 

But there was no changing what had happened. All they could do now was look ahead and weather this storm  _ together. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was gonna be the last chapter, but I decided to do a little epilogue :)


	5. And I don't wanna be somebody without your body

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The epilogue ❤️

_"Oh my god, did you hear?"_

_"What?"_

_"Deidameia's pregnant!"_

_"Shut the fuck up, really?_

_"Yeah, and they say it's_ **_Achilles_ ** _'."_

_"No shit? You think he's gonna marry her?"_

_"I don't know! Honestly thought she was making it up, you know_ dating Achilles."

_"Omg same, but did you see them at Aggy's last month? They way she was grinding all up on him?"_

_"Oh right! Ugh, can you imagine what those abs feel like?"_

Patroclus slammed his locker closed and mentally counted backwards from ten. He really should have started with a higher number like six hundred and fifty eight or something, but then he'd be late for class. He could do this. He could get through this day without punching someone in the face. 

Maybe. 

"So-"

"Yes, I've heard, Bri. Thank you."

Brisies laughed. "Yeah no shit, I think everyone's heard, not what I was gonna say."

"Oh, sorry," he said, scrubbing at his face. "I swear to God if I have to hear one more person ask me about Achilles and Dei I'm going to hit something, or someone."

"Yeah, no, totally get it," she said, pushing off the lockers to make their way towards their next class. "Was gonna ask if we could drop by the stables again this weekend. I miss the horses."

"Balius still ain't for peasants," Achilles said, coming up behind them to drape an arm around Patroclus' shoulders.

"Stop it." Patroclus poked him in his exposed ribs and he flinched, squeaking indignantly. "Balius has actually taken quite well to Bri, you should come. Pedasos misses you."

"Does he now?"

"He does," Patroclus said, bumping Achilles with his hip. He'd missed this. "He told me he misses the way you rode him."

Achilles smirked, leaning in close, his lips brushing the shell of Patroclus' ear. "Just Balius?"

Patroclus shuddered. "Fuck you."

"Later."

"Oh for fuck's sake," Brisies said, "glad y'all worked out whatever the fuck this past month was, but can we get back to the horses?"

"Yes," Patroclus said, shifting away from Achilles as much as he could-- which wasn't much as Achilles basically held him in place. "Saturday? That way Achilles can come too?"

"Achilles can come anytime you want. Just say the word," Achilles said without missing a beat, and honestly, he'd set himself up for that one. 

Brisies rolled her eyes and pushed past them into the classroom. They followed after her, Achilles being forced to disentangle himself when they got to their seats. Patroclus smiled. Achilles was still staring at him, eyes shining with adoration and despite the whole Deidameia mess, he was happy. His Achilles was back. For the past month he had been missing the other half of his soul, and now it was back. 

.

"Achilles!"

Patroclus froze as her shrill voice cut through the noise of the cafeteria. Achilles didn't move. He didn't acknowledge her at all and just kept talking, hand playing with Patroclus' hair as he sat half on top of him.

"Achilles Pelides! Stop ignoring me and be a good boyfriend and come eat lunch with me."

 _That_ got Achilles' attention. The chatter stopped as Achilles turned, hand still in Patroclus' hair as he fixed his eyes on Deidameia. "I am a fantastic boyfriend, just not yours. You can run along now so I can eat lunch with _my_ boyfriend in peace."

"What!?" She shrieked, and Patroclus could feel every pair of eyes in the cafeteria trained on them. He wanted to crawl under the table, but Achilles stayed firmly planted half on his lap while continuing to shove french fries into his mouth. "I'm _pregnant,"_ she continued to scream, her voice growing louder, shriller, "with _your_ child and you're just what, _dumping me!?_ For _him!?"_

Achilles shrugged, "what can I say? You made me realize just how desperately I wanted Patroclus to be my everything."

"I'm _pregnant!"_ She continued to screech, arms flailing wildly as she tried to get him to focus on her. "I'm fucking sixteen and pregnant and you don't even give a shit!"

Patroclus wanted to point out that Achilles really didn't need to give a shit, because _technically_ it was one hundred percent her fault she's pregnant. Instead he chose to take another bite of his burger and feed Achilles another fry. Achilles smiled, graciously taking the fry from him, licking at the salt and grease left on his fingertips. 

"ACHILLES!" She shrieked again, voice cracking on the S. 

With a huff Achilles turned towards her again. "What?"

"You could at least take some responsibility!" She screamed, tears tracking down her face and for half a second Patroclus felt bad for her before seeing red again.

Achilles shifted at his side. His hand dropped from Patroclus' hair to his shoulders, giving them a squeeze and Patroclus released the tension he didn't realize he was holding. "What do you want from me, Dei?" He asked, resting his chin on Patroclus' other shoulder. "If you don't want to keep it, I'll pay for the abortion."

"I-" Deidameia sobbed and collapsed onto the floor, clutching at her midsection. Achilles shrugged and turned back towards his food, hand trailing down Patroclus' back to settle by his hip. 

It wasn't the answer she had been expecting. Considering the talk around school the whole day, she had honestly thought that having _a baby_ would endear Achilles' towards her. _A baby_ which she conceived through rape. The anger still burned hot inside him. He still very much so wanted to punch her in the face, but Achilles' hand on his hip tightened and he was drawn back to what _truly_ mattered. _Achilles._

.

Thetis stared at them. Her lips were stretched into a thin line of displeasure. _'Fuck,'_ Patroclus thought. They were in for it now. Their only saving grace being the fact that Achilles had told her what happened the day after he told him and that she had believed them. Not that Patroclus didn't think she wouldn't believe him, because Achilles didn't lie. Ever. About anything.

"Achilles," she said, at least he had the decency to look halfway ashamed. "Everything we worked for, Achilles. Gone."

"Not _everything,"_ he said, ducking his chin into his sweatshirt. "I can still swim. Still competing for team USA."

"Well yes, you're the fastest swimmer on the team, current holder of three world records, they weren't going to cut you." She let out a long suffering sigh. "Every sponsor we were in talks with have pulled their offers, Achilles. All the trauma you've endured with that girl, the pain you've put Patroclus through, it was all for naught! Nothing! We are left with nothing!"

Achilles lifted his head. Eyes hardening as he stared her down. "Don't pin this on me, _mother._ This whole thing with Deidameia was _your_ idea."

"My idea," she said, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "Yes, _dating_ the girl was my idea, but you," she pointed an accusatory finger at him, "you endorsed teenaged _abortion_ on _national television."_

"I just answered their question," he shot back. 

Thetis sighed as she pinched the bridge of her nose. "Unbelievable," she muttered to herself and then snapped her attention back towards Achilles. "You are hereby strictly forbidden from speaking. Patroclus," she turned towards him and he shrunk back a little, "you now speak for him, at least you _think_ before you speak."

Patroclus stared back at her in disbelief. He wasn't going to argue with her. He wasn't even going to bring up the fact that unless his meets were at home and didn't interfere with his schooling, he wasn't even _allowed_ to go, let alone speak for Achilles. 

.

Deidameia, it turned out, was a psychotic unrelenting bitch. She somehow (after everything), still held onto the ridiculous notion that Achilles would eventually cave and actually _marry_ her. As if having a baby could actually bind him to her.

Most of the time Patroclus didn't know whether to laugh or to scream. The audacity of this bitch. But at the end of the day, Achilles literally gave zero fucks. Not once did he acknowledge her outbursts or tantrums and would just roll his eyes and continue on with whatever it was he was doing.

Patroclus heard the whispers in the halls. All the things people would say about Achilles and how heartless he was. He tried to not let their words bother him, tried to ignore it the way Achilles did. He couldn't though, because it was _wrong,_ they were _wrong._ His Achilles wasn't an asshole. He wasn't before all this bullshit with Deidameia happened, and he certainly wasn't _now,_ especially not for how he was treating her. Honestly he treated her with far more poise and grace than Patroclus would, had he been in his shoes.

But they didn't know. And Achilles, well Achilles didn't care. They could say whatever they wanted about him. The could call him an asshole, say he's fucked up for ditching Deidameia, call him a fag and question his masculinity, because at the end of the day, they _still_ worshiped the very ground he walked. 

Achilles was basically royalty. A celebrity. A _god._ They couldn't break him because he was _above_ them. Deidameia didn't deserve him because she was _beneath_ him, lower than the dirt under his shoes. Their friends, their teammates, they all existed to _serve_ him, and quite frankly he had made it perfectly clear (on multiple occasions) that he thought of them as nothing more than _peasants._ Honestly, Patroclus didn't understand why they all scrambled to please him, as if they could absorb even a miniscule fragment of his greatness by proximity. 

Three months. 

Deidameia kept up the dramatics for three whole months until the end of the school year. Once a week she would declare she didn't want the kid and Achilles would offer to drive her to the clinic and then suddenly she'd want the kid again. Whichever way she swung left Achilles utterly unfazed. Patroclus _almost_ felt bad for her. _Almost._

By the time the last day of school rolled around she was hysterical. One period she wanted the abortion the next she was sobbing uncontrollably begging Achilles to accept her and his child. Achilles still didn't care.

The summer came and with it came the insanity that was the Olympic trials (and the Olympics proper).

Patroclus was lost in a daze of swim meets and press conferences. Of fluttering all over the country (and world) at the behest of Thetis, who truly believed that Patroclus should do all the talking for Achilles. Of course he didn't, but being there with Achilles helped ground him, and evidently being gay and in love was worlds better than being straight and a baby killer.

Luckily for them, Achilles didn't have to go through with his support for abortion, because Deidameia had waivered long enough to be left with no choice but to keep it. Only she wasn't going to keep it. Evidently, if she couldn't get Achilles out of the ordeal she didn't want anything to do with the child either, so she was going to give it up. 

Patroclus didn't exactly _like_ the idea that they were both just giving up this child. It wasn't the child's fault that their mother happened to be a deranged bitch and that their father-- well, under different circumstances Patroclus would have liked to believe that Achilles would be a good father. He had never met someone who loved as fiercely as Achilles did. If Achilles could love _him_ so unconditionally, surely that love would also extend to his potential children. Perhaps in another life, had it been _his_ child, things might have been different.

In the end it really didn't matter. Thetis was granted full custody of the child, a beautiful baby boy for whom Patroclus fell instantly in love with. Forget that he was part Deidameia, he was the spitting image of Achilles.

"Look at him, Achilles," Patroclus said, holding the week old baby in his arms, Thetis hovering close behind him. "He's beautiful."

Achilles looked. He wrinkled his nose and pouted at the sleeping babe in Patroclus' arms. _Neoptolemus,_ Thetis had named him, a new warrior, and considering how hard he had fought to get here, Patroclus found it fitting. "He kinda looks like an alien."

"You kinda look like an alien," Patroclus retorted, even though the statement made no sense, because Achilles looked like a _god._ Then again, gods were _technically_ aliens, right? "He looks just like you," Patroclus said fondly, tracing a finger down the bridge of Neoptolemus' nose before cupping Achilles' cheek, "an alien."

Achilles scoffed, but leaned into his hand and then little Neoptolemus opened his eyes and Achilles stilled. Time stood still for a moment as Achilles stared into the eyes of his son. Thetis came closer, hand resting gently on Achilles' shoulder. "He has your fire, my son."

In that moment, Patroclus was glad that Deidameia went through with the pregnancy. That Thetis chose to keep the child for herself. That Achilles now had the chance to be the father he knew he could be. That he could be a part of this child's life.

Neoptolemus had been born out of hardship and strife, but as Thetis said, he had a fire burning inside him. Patroclus loved him already, and he just knew that in time, Achilles would too. Their little flame, their _Pyrrhus._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some notes about what would appear as inconsistencies with Achilles is an asshole. 
> 
> If you've already read that fic, you might be wondering "but ish, Thetis hates Pat in that fic and Achilles wanted nothing to do with his son." Well that fic is in Brisies' POV and told under her assumptions of their relationships. 
> 
> So we knowThetis has custody, but Pat is the one who convinces them to allow Dei visitation. He thought it would be a good idea to have the kid know his mom because at the end of the day that's still his mom, event though she's a terrible human.
> 
> He went the first time, but he and Dei 100% got into it and he realized it was a terrible idea for him to be there so he doesn't go anymore. Which brings us back to Achilles' early morning meetings with his mom which Pat doesn't go to. Achilles goes with Thetis to see Dei and Pat sulks at home drinking out of a raccoon mug because he knows if he does he'll probably punch Dei in the face.
> 
> Pat and Achilles have a VERY good relationship with Pyrrhus, and Pyrrhus absolutely adored Pat. Achilles is his partner in crime and Pat swears he is just constantly dealing with two children. Only, because Achilles is a very private person, as far as anyone else knows, both Achilles and Dei are assholes and abandoned ttheirkid and Thetis raises him.
> 
> Hence Bri still thought he was an Asshole because there's no way she'd know the full story. 
> 
> The end. Thank you for coming on this journey with me

**Author's Note:**

> Story is completed, updates weekly.
> 
> Come scream at me on [Twitter - ishxallxgood](https://twitter.com/ishxallxgood)


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